Gilbert and the cigar stand!

It had been dreary and wet in the morning for our first round on The Castle and we were somewhat lacking enthusiasm for a second loop as we sat in The Old Course shack. It was the end of a rather hard week and the shack was nearly empty. I guess more experienced caddies had taken a taken a more insightful look at the weather forecast than I had.
Anyway we were allocated a group on The New Course and were pleased to see eight smiling Singapore gentlemen who were obviously in good spirits. And I think it was whisky, definitely malt and with peaty overtones.
I was matched up with Gilbert who was of dark Indian extraction and who looked fun. His friend Shappy gave me the scorecard and said don’t let him (Gilbert) near it. And I soon realised why as Gilbert could not keep his score. He got it wrong every time. Now this was partly understandable given the great number of shots he was taking. But it always erred in his favour. Moreover if he had a really bad hole like a twelve it would be classed as a ‘double bogey’.
Anyway on the fourth he drew out this monstrous cigar and started to rummage around in his golf bag for something. He then brought out this long shaft thing which was not a golf club. And of course I should have known: it was a three foot long cigar stand!
Anyway this did nothing for Gilbert’s golf, as it got progressively worse and we zig-zagged up every fairway from one patch of wet rough to another. It was exhausting. And on the fifteenth tee Gilbert said this is awful and I agreed. He said he hadn’t even had a drink yet this round. And I thought that maybe he should and can I please have one too.

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