Ok this is a bit insane but I have just got up on a Saturday morning and it’s 3.10 am. The students are just coming home after their parties and I’m now having a coffee writing this blog. The problem is that I set my alarm for 4am and if I set my alarm for 4am then I will wake up earlier. But he ho.

However, the reason I set my alarm that early on a Saturday morning is that I am travelling down to Edinburgh for our MCBA Spring Meeting at Gullane, the first Major of the season for our whacky wee club the MCBA. We are due to tee-off at 10am down in beautiful East Lothian and the weather promises to be fair (not that I necessarily trust the Scottish weather forecast or weather forecasters per se even though I thought Francis was a pretty cool dude as a kid and indeed Michael Fish too, well actually I thought he was a really good old fish if I am entirely honest)

Anyway that’s the programme for today folks. Yesterday I was down at Mortonhall playing my singles tie and it was beautiful and sunny and the sweet smelling furze was ablaze in yellow fire and the sky was blue and occasional wafts of wild garlic oozed out of the musky woods and a pheasant idled around the 8th green and two deer danced down the 12th fairway. But I am being too poetical. I won by 2 and 1.

I played a mixed bag but I probably hit two of the best golf shots of my life and I am being serious here (not that I didn’t win 2 and 1 btw) Firstly a recovery shot up and through a steep grassy bank under a hawthorn tree where I rolled it close and then a low 3 iron draw, Tiger Woods style (pre car crashes), bending it under a cherry tree and over 200 yards to the front apron of the 13th green and I maintain that if it hadn’t hit a tiny bit of full blown blossom then it would have been mightily close and that bit of blossom would still be full blown. I think that was the match winner though. Certainly in my head. It was worthy of Augusta coverage and would have had Peter Allis waxing quite lyrical I suggest, especially the exploding cherry blossom bit.

Anyway , as ever, I am still tinkering with the old swing and have just looked at a video of myself from last week out on the course where I appeared to be a bit too cramped I’m afraid. The arms weren’t hanging Errnie like and I was a bit too steep. Anyhow I will take that on board when I hit the practice range in 5 hours time. Nothing like a last minute swing adjustment just before a Major what.

So wish me luck folks and have a blast of a weekend but watch the cherry trees, especially if you are in Edinburgh at the moment down at the Meadows because they are intensely beautiful.

Up the Hearts !

And fare forward of course

ps I forgot to tell you about a wee phone call I received on the course yesterday. I was waiting to hit my pre-Tiger Woods car crashes Augusta cherry blossom low draw shot, when the estate agent phoned (we are trying to set up a viewing on Monday) Anyway I quickly explained that I would have to whisper as I was golfing. She said ‘what’s your position?’ and I told her that ‘I’m in the middle of the 14th fairway’ to which there was a considerable delay when she tried to take assimilate that comment, at which point I thought I would relieve her of this awkwardness and said ‘just joking’ and she said ‘sorry the line is not great’ which I think was not necessarily the truth. And I quickly added and indeed more to her point that we may be a cash buyer for the flat . And I must say she was a wee bit wrong footed over all this.

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I have had a sublime day. In fact truly sublime.

I started off with my lovely group from Alabama who I met off the bus in St Andrews at 11am. I had showed them around Edinburgh two days ago and we really clicked. They were such an amazing set of characters and so easy going and fun and actually laughed at some of my jokes. What a joy for me to show them around St Andrews as well. We were lucky with the weather too and everything went swimmingly. I really hope I see these lovely people again. One lady, Cath I think, was very inspiring. She had had several careers and ended up qualifying as a nurse at the age of 60 and won the Nightingale prize out of a class of 300 plus people. But what a person. And what a nurse she surely would have been. Her husband too was lovely and gentle, as were the rest of the group. All of them actually. What a delight. Bill did a wonderful job putting this tour together.

I rushed off afterwards to meet Kevin, one of the Fried Egg podcasters, better known as KVV, who wanted me with my pencil bag and on my bike in front of the Royal and Ancient to do a wee interview and give some local insights into the Auld Toon. Now I think it went ok but was maybe a bit too risque for them, although I’m really not sure to be honest. The starter was ‘Keith what did you study at St Andrews? I thought why not and gave them ‘GGE’ At which point there was this slight pause and quizzical look from Kevin and then I expanded ‘girls, golf and economics’ Then another slight pause and a very hard to discern look from Kevin when I then concluded ‘A bit like PPE at Oxford but more high-browed’. The next question from Kevin followed rather quickly may I add.

Anyway we shall see what results. It was fun and it was kind of just me which is ok by me but certainly not for everyone. It’s all I can do though. We will see if they broadcast it or not. I hay me doobts. But I hope they do because I really liked Kevin and I like what Fried Egg are about. They are a sound bunch of pretty cool guys.

And that is a rare thing nowadays in the media world. I mean we have people like Nick Faldo and Ian Carter and that Dougherty chappy who are as dull as a ditch can be and then you have clowns like Ant and Dec and what can I say about people like that? but OMG ‘get me a train and get me to Grantchester again’.

I finished off my day by going down the range as I had had a very indifferent round the day after my medal victory last Thursday when I went to play in Edinburgh. I watched a McIlroy video this morning and this takeaway drill. And I have just got back from trying this out and boy did it work! I have now kind of ditched the Tiger post second car crash tip. Sorry Tiger.

But as some of you are aware I do change my swing about once a week. And who knows what or indeed who will pitch up next week. Anyway, on today’s form may I add say that this Rory insight is going to be well more expensive. I was bombing it. I know that Rory should own it but I am kind of crusading it and I will give him a cut. So long as he gives me a game one day. I will even use my points and get him a cheap game on the Old Lady.

Anyway we shall see tomorrow in Edinburgh as I am playing at 1pm with some friends and then coming back in the evening to go to dinner with 8 Americans who want a bit of golf history chat over their dinner at Forgans, courtesy of Celtic Golf.

And I will of course oblige as it would be rude not to.

Fare forward passengers.

I was at the entertaining Fried Egg podcast at the Byre Theatre last night and was quite impressed by these guys, so I thought I would send off a wee email this morning to try and hook up with them. They seemed to have cracked it on the podcast front and are real natural communicators.

Anyhow I then went for a practice range session to try out my new chipping technique and Tigers revolutionary post-second car crash insight. It’s all about the club head folks!

Cycling back up the links I saw three guys coming out of the St Andrews Club and low and behold they were wearing Fried Egg baseball caps and it was indeed the three bods from last night’s podcast. Of course I introduced myself and they said we might able to hook up or something. You never know. Anyway if not I think I will be following Fried Egg for my gowf insights.

Otherwise the weather is sublime in the Auld Toun and the courses are looking great. I am so excited about my gowf but that will be tested in a medal on the Eden today and another down in Edinburgh at Mortonhall on Saturday. I have a whole new game up my sleeve. However I obviously can’t tell you at the moment because this is going to be huge and it has cost me so much. Indeed so much pain. Mental, physical, relationship. True golf pain. You guys know what I mean. And so it’s going to be expensive.

Just follow my blog please and you will maybe find out one day how forty years of golf tinkling has resolved itself in a few simple moves ! And yes I know hope springs eternal and all that.

Fare forward passengers

Stop Press: Hey folks I won the St Andrews medal today! Had a 74 on the Eden. So there might be some credence in the above blarney!

Apologies not to have written a blog for so long. I have been busy. Yes busy. And everything is going swimmingly may I say.

I will delay on a summary of my drinking or non-drinking actually until the year end. I am holding up very well. I have been helped by some excellent counselling at FASS may I say.

My tour guiding has just started again and I am very fortunate to have a growing and more diverse client base which I like. For example last week I had a lovely couple from the States, Michael and Kate Heard, who I took round Edinburgh in the morning, then we caught a train to St Andrews and capped off with a wee food tour of the town which they seemed to really enjoy.

Next day I had 3 lovely Americans guys on the Old Course and we had great fun and they were super appreciative of the chance to play the Auld Lady. It’s such a special thing to play on the most famous golf course in the world and at the Home of Golf.

On Saturday I did a whisky storytelling talk at the Rusacks which was great fun with 6 Canadians, four of whom I had caddied for last year at the Fairmont! They were rather taken back to see me in Room 116 of the Rusacks in my kilt and their somewhat host for the afternoon.

So all great fun. But this year I am trying to get a better balance of tours and me-time. And that should be cool because at the ripe age of 63 and a quarter I don’t want to be overdoing things. Not that I have ever over done things on the work front as most of my friends know. In fact it is been a rather weird and wonderful and sometimes rather bumpy route that has brought me back to my alma mater and enter the twilight period of my life. It’s funny that my Mum always said she could see me ending up living by the sea. And she was right.

But I have been very lucky to get the set up I now enjoy in St Andrews. Bumping into lovely Johnathan at the Fairmont one day for my initial lead into tour guiding and then getting on a number 11 bus one day and striking up a conversation with a man in a kilt who got me into Tours By Locals. Funny how things come about sometimes, especially when one jumps onto buses. It’s how I met my wife on the X59.in Edinburgh bus station. And that was a blessing. Indeed doubly lucky that day because her festival show had been cancelled and I had run out of money to buy another pint in Cafe Royale even though I was quite engrossed in a lovely chat with this chap called Tom.

My golf is coming on great. I managed 2 over for 15 holes on the Old on Monday which is good for me. Don’t ask about the last 3 holes though. And today I was one over on the Old after 11 holes. So there is life yet in this 63 and a quarter year old yet!

So guys and galls I will try and post my summer experiences and keep you more up to date.

Slainthe and fare forward passengers.