Start to feel vaguely normal again after a horrifying and scary 4 full days and nights of awful anxiety, the DT’s, very poor quality and sporadic sleep, deep sadness and regret.
Just listened to a great podcast SoberLeon about how he fell so many times and it wasn’t till he saw alcohol for what it really was and does to your body that he finally got it and was able to give up. He had tried will power, AA etc but it was this perspective on it that worked. I like this. Not to see it as that tasty and emotional bonding , idealised healthy glass of red but as actual poison. That’s a framer.
And another significant and oh so important thing he says is ‘don’t forget about the pain’ . And that is a massive point. Because after a bit of time if and probably when the idea of controlled drinking comes back in, it is very easy to gloss over what the downside scenario could well be. We can forget the absolute torture of alcohol withdrawal and the time it takes. Just how long we are trapped in that prison of regret. It’s almost unbearable. So we must somehow alert ourselves and remember this and the dangerous position we risk putting ourselves in.This is what CBT works away at. And it’s a huge thing and hard to underestimate the importance of.
Another podcast which hit home was this very transparent and articulate guy who said that no matter how he tried to do it and with so many attempts it always eventually led to a disastrous binge.
This is me.
But anyway that’s enough at the moment .The sun is shining, my wife is so supportive, although deeply anxious,, my tour guiding is going so well, my golf is good and there is so much going well in my life.
My friends too have been so helpful.
I am lucky in so many ways.
On a purely political note though isn’t it great to see so many decent Americans take to the street in Boston etc. This must grow till the people show the clown that enough is enough. This guy thinks he really is God. And God help us. Otherwise America is doomed. This conman has somehow got himself into a very strong position. And the only way now is for people in their masses to show what they feel about this ‘truth social’ maniac who is raping America. It is the biggest con in history and a very sad reflection of our times. Trump and his ‘Truth Social’ are surely the biggest jokes out there. He is big bad. A child. A very deluded and sick, weak man.
Fare forward passengers.